Thursday, October 18, 2007

TIME TO GO TO KENNY AND ZUKES

If you know me you know two things:

1: I am a sweet dude
2: I have never been able to find a bagel for sale in Portland that meets my bagel needs.

If you don't know me then know this: JEWISH FOOD IS BETTER THAN THE VOMITOUS SWILL YOU ARE EATING.

If you didn't know this, then you now get to find out:

http://www.kennyandzukes.com/

It says there that they aren't open yet but that is a clever ruse to fool the unworthy masses so they will steer clear while those among us able to appreciate True Greatness can sample their wares in relative peace before the official "grand" opening.

Alright I can tell I am raving here so listen: KENNY AND ZUKES IS A NEW UPSCALE DELI NEAR POWELL'S CITY OF BOOKS IN DOWNTOWN PORTLAND. THEY ARE OFFERING A "SOFT OPENING" STARTING YESTERDAY AND THE FOOD IS DISCOUNTED BY 20%. THIS IS THE BEST FOOD FOR SALE IN PORTLAND RIGHT NOW.

I ORDERED A REUBEN LAST NIGHT AND IT WAS SO GOOD THAT I COULDNT EVEN DRAW IT CORRECTLY SO I DREW A REUBEN AND THEN I DREW IT IN THE PLACE WHERE ARTISTS NORMALLY DRAW HEAVEN TO INDICATE THAT THE REUBEN I ORDERED WAS A SUITABLE REPLACEMENT FOR AN ETERNAL PARADISE. DOES THAT MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU AT ALL?